Or a look under my own sink…
Let’s get one thing straight: I don’t live in an episode of Hoarders. But if someone had peeked under my kitchen sink last week, they might have assumed otherwise. A few rogue cleaning bottles? Expected. A mountain of forgotten sponges and oven cleaner stockpiled like I’m preparing for an apocalypse? Less acceptable.
So, in the spirit of A Few Good Men, I’m putting myself on trial. No lies. No excuses. Just the cold, hard truth about what lurks beneath my sink. Spoiler: It’s not pretty. But with 5S, we’re turning this dumpster fire into a lean, mean, cleaning machine.
Avert your eyes, the horror!
Step 1: Sort – The Brutal Truth About My Under-Sink Nightmare
This is where it all starts: looking the mess directly in the eye and acknowledging that I might have a problem. The first thing I did was haul everything out from under the sink and throw it into the cold light of day. This process was, in a word, humbling.
Exhibit A: Oven Cleaner Overload
Turns out, I own five different brands of oven cleaner, despite using my oven approximately twice a year. Either I black out and impulse buy cleaning supplies, or I suffer from extreme memory loss when it comes to what I already own.
Exhibit B: Sponges
I don’t know who I thought I was preparing for—a small army of dishwashing-obsessed elves, perhaps? I counted 17 sponges. Seventeen! Some still in their original packaging, others shoved into the back like multiplying Gremlins. I threw out the nasty, old sponges from God knows when before the picture below.
Miscellaneous Junk: Half-empty bottles of mystery liquid, expired cleaning wipes, and a single rubber glove (because who needs a pair?).
The Verdict:
- Keep: The essentials (dish soap, trash bags, one sponge).
- Donate: Unopened cleaning products to a local shelter.
- Trash: Everything else. Including my dignity.
Pro Tip: If you haven’t used it in a year, it’s dead weight. Let it go.
Step 3: Shine – The Nasty Truth About Under-Sink Filth (Yes – this is out of order, but it had to be done as soon as possible)
If you ever want to question all of your life choices, take a look at the bottom of your under-sink cabinet. Years of random drips, spills, and neglected cleaning left mine looking like a crime scene from a low-budget horror movie.
Scrub Everything: Out came the disinfecting wipes, a bucket of soapy water, and an unreasonable amount of elbow grease.
Pro Tip: Use vinegar and baking soda for cleaning. They’re cheap, eco-friendly, and won’t make your kitchen smell like a chemical spill.
Step 2: Set in Order – Because Digging Through Junk is Not a Lifestyle
Now that we’ve purged the junk, it’s time to Set in Order. Translation: Give everything a home, because “somewhere under the sink” isn’t a strategy.
Now that I had faced my hoarding tendencies, it was time to make some tough calls. The objective? Keep only what I actually need and make it easy to find moving forward.
Categorize: Cleaning sprays together, dishwashing supplies in one spot, and for the love of all that is holy, one bottle of oven cleaner (not five). I actually moved the oven cleaner to the basement for the few times a year its used.
Invest in Storage: I picked up some under-sink organizers
Step 4: Standardize – The Battle Plan for Future Me
At this point, things were looking good. But keeping it that way? That’s another story. Here’s where standardization kicks in:
Limit the Inventory: I don’t need 17 sponges. One or two in active use, a small backup supply, and that’s it.
Use a Restock Checklist: A simple list inside the cabinet keeps track of what I actually need to buy—no more blind panic purchases at the store.
Step 5: Sustain – The True Test of Discipline
Sustain is the hardest part. It’s not about one big win—it’s about staying punk in a world that wants you to sell out.
Daily Micro-Revolutions: Spend 5 minutes a day maintaining your system. Clean Sink. Clean under the sink. Toss junk mail. Put tools back. Pretend you’re in a montage.
Monthly Check-Ins: I set a reminder to reevaluate what’s under the sink every month. If things start piling up again, I know I need to reign it in. Toss what’s expired, donate what’s unused, and remind yourself why you started this mess.
One-In, One-Out Rule: If I buy a new cleaning product, something else has to go. No more clutter accumulation.
Share the System: If you live with other people, make sure they know the system. Otherwise, your perfectly arranged under-sink area will become chaos in a matter of days.
Final Thoughts: A Few Good Cleaning Habits
Look, the truth is, most of us are guilty of having a space in our home that’s a total disaster zone. The key isn’t just organizing it once—it’s making it stupidly easy to keep it organized long-term. The 5S method works because it forces you to be intentional. It makes you question why you own five different bottles of the same cleaner, and it prevents you from sliding back into chaos.
So, if you’re feeling brave, take a peek under your own sink. Can you handle the truth? Or are you about to uncover a graveyard of forgotten cleaning products and lost sponges? Either way, I promise—it’s worth the effort to get it under control.
TL;DR: Life’s a mess. Declutterpunk is your anthem. Now go break some clutter—and maybe a few rules.
Stay ungovernable,
Tim
The DeClutterPunk | Because Good Enough is the New Perfect
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